Thursday, November 18, 2010

Signing Off.....

Just from the blogger space :). Its really been a wonderful space to be in. Blogger has nurtured me so long, helped me put out the thoughts, rants, complaints, feelings and all that came to my mind on its space. As I read through the posts here, I can see a lot of things changing within me too.
Now with all that baggage on my back, am shifting bases. Have bought a domain for myself! I guess thatz when you can believe that I've become pompous enough to take my writings with seriousness. LOL.. whatever, it is, blogger will always remain special for me.
So my dear readears, if I may be so vain enough as to assume that you still visit these pages, I would request you to take a bit more of brunt and do come and visit me at my place on web - :)
Hoping to continue to see you there.....

Thanks blogger! :) Eternally indebted to you... :)

Wednesday, March 10, 2010

Kabootar Ja...Ja...Jaa....

Not very long ago, I am sure you all remember the pomp and glory with which our esteemed self had announced its return to the home turf. The bon homie did last for sometime I must say, and now, our mommy dearie wants to get into the details. Just what are those specifics that she is underlining offlate is any boy-staying-with-parents’ guess! Right from picking up the clothes lying around in ma room.. to picking up a bride (to loiter around in my room) is on the list of have-to-dos. One is more akin to seein’ the quintessential linear markings of a certain silver kind on the dark horizon and thus amidst all this, we spotted a lot of grub for blog! So after mommy dearest handed down the list of “do-this-else-i’ll-whop-your-sorry-a$$”, we got down to handle the daunting tasks… in order that suited us! And here we are dishing out a post! Amen!!

While sorting out the fossils accumulated in my book shelf drawers (the first on the list), out popped the long dead Engineering notes, half drawn sketches of God-only-knows-what, birthday cards, mushy bye-bye cards, scrap books (Ah! the innocence of childhood), and finally a bundle of letters! Hmmmm… letters…. mused my mind. Much like the neandrethel gaping at the spherical structure in front of him, and uttering those weird sounds “Wheee”… “Wheee”… “Wheeeeel” to make up for the lack of anything more sensible, I made similar sounds albeit of more sophistication “OOoooooohhh!!” “Aaaaaahhhh”… “Awwwww” and the likes. Memories tumbled down of my first pen-pal(ly) ofcourse! She was a friend of Prarthana while we were in highschool and was looking for a pen-pal. Needless to say, being the boy of the hour, I stepped in duly to fulfill her needs, and soon enough, Prarts was playing the Kabootar between me and her. Ofcourse there was no romantic inclination, lemme make it clear upfront. But there certainly was the charm associated with penning words that we knew would be gazed at by a friend at the other end. And great wonder of wonders! We also found a wonderfully hidden, yellowing parchment of what was once a paper, that had in it the loving yearning of a girl, I was so totally smitten by while I was in 7th Standard! Yep! Buddies!! with eyes moistening, I realized that the Stupid Cupid afterall had managed to preserve just one letter of my Wonder years when I had written my first love letter to the one girl I had gifted my heart to, on a platter!! I read, re-read, re-re-read the letter…..and finally for lack of anything better, let out a sigh.

Do people still write Love letters? Have any of you written a love letter? The idea of a letter by itself in this fast paced lightning-speed email/sms age seems archaic. Needless to say, its already replaced the notion of a postman to someone who brings in the bills and statements than anything remotely humane in content! Maybe in the remote corners of India, people still communicate using letters, and maybe someday, if my mom has her way, I’ll be taking my kids over there to show them just how a snail-mail (such an unromantic and degrading nomenclature) looks and works! Anyhooo, lets get back to the Love letters. The idea of writing a love letter itself was so irrepressibly romantic that it spawned generations of lilting romantic numbers in every language that has dished out movies on the screen! Be it Rajendra kumar begging Vyjayanthimala not to give him a beating with “Yeh mera prem patr padhkar”, to Shashi kapoor doing his stick-dance for a sharmili Asha Parekh with “Likhe jo khat tujhe…woh teri yaad mein”…. aaaahh!! I know, so many of you are now silently nodding their heads and smiling! ;) Circa 1990s and Bhagyashree coaxing the dove to carry her letter to Sallu Bhai had set the hearts rolling on the streets, gallis and nukkads. And surely enough, every heart ever asunder in the burning fire of pining love was doling out letters by kilos! Nowadays, we have our ears bulldozed by Reshammiyas of the netherworlds, who don’t know which particular anatomy of their body should be used to sing let alone act!

The first time I ever saw a love letter was ofcourse by “accident” when I was fishing through the locker of my parents looking for chocolates (Yep!! There! I said it! My mom had the most dubious distinction of hiding my favorite chocolates in the weirdest of places least of which wasn’t the locker). I wasn’t ofcourse able to read through it entirely, what with the details being etched in miniscule letters for want of more space! But the gist mentioned in the first couple of lines of how much she missed my father was sufficient enough to turn my cheeks a deep hue of pink! Later ofcourse, entirely due to the fault of the genes my lovely parents bestowed me with, I was handling out love letters left, right and center! :D And if girls flipped by the lot, well, what can I say! Magic hands baby ;) (and the genes ofcourse!!)

The toughest part of writing a love letter, I feel is just that! The writing!! Painstakingly you have to choose the words to give just the right amount of feeling. Not too laid back, not too desperate! Not handing the heart on a platter, nor barricading it! How does one dish out such a word-perfect love letter?! I am yet to discover! The emphasis is ofcourse laid on the feeling not just the verbal cosmetics. And inspite of all the best laid out words, one can never be too assured of a hit (sic) both physical and emotional!! :P

After writing, comes the second daunting task of actually handing over the letter to the girl. Many a movie plots have found this to be the turning point that they seek! Hearts stop and breathes gasp just as the poor hero goes to hand over the love letter to the lady-love only to find her cozing up in the arms of his best friend or worst rival! Ouch! Else we have him with sweaty hands and smelly arm pits handing it over to the girl and soon are teleported to swiss locales to find them both prancing around like puppies with cooties! The best that has ever transpired when I handed a love letter was to find the girl smile and nod her consent while the worst… well… let’s not get into it! The post is increasing in its size! ;) For those who are worried of their well being, ofcourse there are friends - both human and non-human that can be called upon to aid in the need of the hour! Dogs, pigeons, swans, to monkeys have all essayed the roles of romantic messengers.

Love has certainly come of age! We no longer talk of “janam-janam ka naata”! Lovers these days philosophize about the effervescence of public buses and girls (or boys too!) in our lives and rightly forbid from too much of mourning. Love letters have become short and crisp. They have changed to the formats of emails and sms. From agonizingly long sentences prophecizing the lives that one would want to live with one another, we now see “I lv u. Wanna gt 2gthr” being txtd arnd! Love makes the world go round and Love letters ensure that corporates stay in business. The VHPs and Bajrang Dals of the world not withstanding, we still celebrate love the old fashioned way atleast once in a year with Valentine’s Day! People exchange greeting cards (for those strapped of cash, there’s e-cards), write love poems, treat eachother at candle light dinners, propose, depose, and maybe a few of them proclaim their love through words etched on a paper!!!

Those of you who are in love, go home, or if your project is boring, snatch that letter pad and write something out, in your own handwriting, your own feelings and send it across to that one loving heart that you feel is meant for you! Those of you who wanna be in love, do the same and keep ur fingers crossed! In the meanwhile….I have a lot more cleaning to do and who knows what I may find next to spawn a lengthy boring post to heckle you all with!! ;)

Sunday, November 08, 2009

Hum bhi agar bachhe hote...

Had a bad night. Unwanted, unwarranted, misleading and misunderstood argument with a friend, hurtful words, unintended meanings stifling the air around me! Nearly sleepless night.... grubby morning, cloudy weather, Monday!
Made a fake cheery presence to my mom, and headed towards the auto stand... 3 buses full of kids, probably on their way to a picnic pull over near the traffic signal, and out of nowhere, the whole bunch of kids lined up near the windows called out and a medley of "TaTa!!" "Good Morning", "Anna!! Hiiiiiii" rang out! And suddenly it all seemed okie. :)

Why is it so tough for us to be child like? Simple... uncomplicated... and contended?

Tuesday, September 22, 2009

After a While...

Received this poem as a comment from Sushma.... was so good that I didn't think it was fair to leave it in the comments section so moving it as a post.

I know it has feminine overtones to it.. but I strongly feel it transgresses the genders...

After a While

After a while
you learn
The subtle difference between
Holding a hand and chaining a soul
And you learn that love doesn't mean leaning
And company doesn't always mean security.

And you begin to learn
That kisses aren't contracts
And presents aren't promises
And you begin to accept your defeats
With your head up and your eyes ahead
With the grace of a woman
Not the grief of a child

And you learn
To build all your roads on today
Because tomorrow's ground is
Too uncertain for plans
And futures have a way
Of falling down in mid flight

After a while you learn
That even sunshine burns if you get too much
So you plant your own garden
And decorate your own soul
Instead of waiting
For someone to bring you flowers

And you learn
That you really can endure
That you are really strong
And you really do have worth
And you learn and you learn
With every good bye you learn.

Veronica A. Shoffstall

Saturday, September 05, 2009

You are Framed!!

One of the most horrible crimes we can commit in a relationship is to frame people! Limit their scope, actions and responses into a framework and expect the magnanimous human personality with its countless manifestations and attributes to fit into that framework. We did the same to God, we do the same to human beings (or is it vice versa?!!)! And we wonder why relationships don't work or seem so complicated!!! Sigh....

Wednesday, July 29, 2009

Mr. Hyde......

Got into the Bus 333T (Volvo) near my office. There was a pleasant Kannada station playing on the radio. There were 2 girls from North (very coincidental... I hold nothing against them.. just their attitudes. Read on) started acting smart... passing ridiculous comments.. and making stupid remarks.. with their usual gusto! To top it off.. they started playing some stupid pop numbers on their laptop in full volume.
Couldn't tolerate it.. mouthed off.. and before getting down... called them B*******! I know I lost my cool.. I also know that I wanted to lose it.

Wednesday, July 01, 2009

Dushman na kare......

Its early in the morning... its been 2 days now and am disturbed. It is an unnerving experience as if you have just been burgled!! And the culprit is someone you had least expected to do something like this. Yes, we are all accustomed to thinking that strangers are more akin to rob us. But when the ones you consider close to you, or thought would be close, turn out to be total strangers, it is a nerve wrecking experience, and to top it, to have the feeling of being betrayed stuffed down your throat only worsens the situation. We are all just "somebody" to everyone else, I guess! Unfortunately that includes some people who aren't "somebody" for us!

It really hurts - That the person who you don't think to be "somebody" for you, thinks that you are "just somebody"! Karma? Human psychology? I'm playing the song - "Dushman na kare.." in a repetitive mode. I have no other song that can better touch my mood right now. Am I letting it worsen, or do I actually want to get over it? God as my witness, I really do want to get over this! I want to forget everything that happened, and just move on! But its so much easier said than done! I've often times emphasized to so many that one has to forgive and forget to achieve the peace of mind. But yet, today that seems like the hardest thing for me to do. Not forgiving, but forgetting all that happened. "pehle toh hosh cheen liye zulm-o-sitam se, deewangi ka phir hamein ilzaam diya hai"

Gladly enough I haven't shed tears for all that has happened. LOL! I am not smiling that it happened either! But the pain is killing! The hurt is deep, and closed wounds somehow have opened up again! I am vulnerable afterall!! "na khuda ka hum ne jinhe naam diya hai.... umr bhar ka gam hamein inaam diya hai..." Gawd!! I just wish I could wake up in the morning and find out that all of this was just a bad, terrible, and hopeless dream! There is a growing numbness in my heart... cold and deathly.... and am gasping for breathe... there was a hand that seemed as if it was ready to clasp me and pull me aboard... only then did I realize that it was the hand that actually overthrew me into the cold currents that are lapping me up into their bosoms...............and am too shocked to even scream.........